| 50°F |
New Yorkers try to turn on the heat. |
Canadians
plant gardens. |
| 40°F |
Californians shiver uncontrollably. |
Canadians sunbathe. |
| 35°F |
Italian cars won't start. |
Canadians drive with
the windows down. |
| 32°F |
Distilled water freezes. |
Canadian water gets thicker. |
| 20°F |
Floridians wear coats, gloves & wool
hats |
Canadians throw on a t-shirt. |
| 15°F |
Californians begin to evacuate the state. |
Canadians go swimming. |
| 0°F |
New York landlords finally turn up the heat. |
Canadians have the last cook-out before it gets cold. |
| -10°F |
People in Miami cease to exist. |
Canadians lick flag poles to see if their tongue will stick. |
| -20°F |
Californians fly away to Mexico. |
Canadians throw on a light jacket. |
| -40°F |
Hollywood disintegrates. |
Canadians rent some videos. |
| -60°F |
Mt. St. Helens freezes. |
Canadian Girl Guides
begin selling cookies door to door. |
| -80°F |
Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica. |
Canadian Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets cold
enough. |
| -100°F |
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. |
Canadians
pull down their ear flaps. |
| -173°F |
Ethyl alcohol freezes. |
Canadians get frustrated
when they can't thaw the keg. |
| -297°F |
Microbial life survives on dairy products. |
Canadian cows complain of farmers with cold hands. |
| -460°F |
ALL atomic motion stops. |
Canadians start saying
"Cold 'nuff for ya?" |
| -500°F |
Hell freezes over. |
The Toronto Maple Leafs win
the Stanley Cup. |
