ELEMENT: Woman
SYMBOL: Wo
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: Accepted as 53.6 kg but known to vary from 40 to 200 kg
OCCURRENCE: Copious quantities in all urban areas

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:

• Surface usually covered with a painted film.
• Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason.
• Melts if given special treatment.
• Bitter if incorrectly used.
• Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
• Yields to pressure applied to correct points.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:

• Has a great affinity for gold, silver and a range of precious metals.
• Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
• May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.
• Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
• Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES:

• Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
• Can be a great aid in relaxation.
• Very effective cleaning agent.

TESTS:

• Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.
• Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

HAZARDS:

• Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
• Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at
  different locations, provided specimens do not come in contact with each other.